In response to the ladies….

Hmm… Thought i might as well post our reply to the ladies… =D!!  Had a draft . Just edited it up..

[     Once a man was waiting for a taxi. A beggar came along and asked him for some money. The man ignored him. But being a professional, the beggar kept on pestering him. The man became irritated when he realized that the beggar would not leave him alone unless he parts with some money. Suddenly an idea struck him.

 He told the beggar, "I do not have money, But if you tell me what you want to do with the money, I will certainly help you."

"I would have bought a cup of tea", replied the beggar.

The man said, "Sorry man. I can offer you a cigarette instead of  tea". He then took a pack of cigarettes from his pocket and offered one to the beggar.

The beggar told, "I don't smoke as it is injurious to health."

The man smiled and took a bottle of whisky from his pocket and told the beggar, "Here, take this bottle and enjoy the stuff. It is really good".

The beggar refused by saying, "Alcohol muddles the brain and damages the liver".

The man smiled again. He told the beggar, "I am going to the race course. Come with me and I will arrange for some tickets and we will place bets. If we win, you take the whole amount and leave me alone".

 As before, the beggar politely refused the latest offer by saying, "Sorry sir, I can't come with you as betting on horses is a bad habit."

Suddenly the man felt relieved !!

"Well",said the man,"I'm not going to give you the money.Instead, I'm going to take you out for dinner with my wife and myself tonight".

The beggar was astounded and his face lit up in anticipation of receiving at least something from the man. But he still had his doubts and asked the man, "Why do you want me to go to your house with you. wont your wife be furious with you for doing that?".

The man replied................................................. 

"Nah.. Thats okay. Its important for my wife to see how a man with no Bad habits looks like."  ... ]

  ….. Lol.. 

Look how they can twist it…..

Just came across this one the other day.. ;P..

[        A woman was walking down the street when she was accosted by a particularly dirty and shabby-looking homeless woman who asked her for a couple of dollars for dinner. The woman took out her wallet, extracted ten dollars and asked, "If I give you this money, will you buy some wine with it instead of dinner?"

"No," I had to stop drinking years ago, the homeless woman replied.

"Will you use it to go shopping instead of buying food?" the woman asked.

"No," I don't waste time shopping, the homeless woman said. "I need to spend all my time trying to stay alive."

"Will you spend this on a beauty salon instead of food?" the woman asked.

"Are you NUTS!" replied the homeless woman. "I haven't had my hair done in 20 years!"

"Well," said the woman, "I'm not going to give you the money. Instead, I'm going t o take you out for dinner with my husband and myself tonight.

The homeless Woman was astounded. "Won't your husband be furious with you for doing that? I know I'm dirty, and I probably smell pretty disgusting."

The woman replied, "That's okay. It's important for him to see what a woman looks like after she has given up shopping, hair appointments and wine." ]  ….

      Cant beat ‘em in twisting the arms.. rite!!.. ;P